The Future

I've been looking at post-secondary courses pertaining to professional writing for self-publication lately. I'm trying to get myself used to the idea of embracing this new path that I want to explore. It's been a journey trying to find a course that will fit exactly what I'm looking for. Many of them require you to already have a post-secondary diploma, which I do not have. Others just don't relate to me, more so focusing on creative writing and digital media rather than honing freelance writing skills.

I want to make a career out of helping people discover all the possibilities that lie within them. I want for people to realize new things about themselves with the help of my words. I was thinking that I should look into courses related to psychology or understanding human behaviour to act as research behind my words. To learn more about the human experience and why we act the way that we do in situations. I would love for there to be a combined course about this, but perhaps I can find a college or university that provides a major and minor, so that I can explore and learn in both areas within the same degree.

I still have a lot of research to do for this and I'm trying my best to not close my mind off to new opportunities as they present themselves. I'm starting where I feel I should but I want to find more relatable resources to my particular circumstances. I don't like traditional sources, I like to work outside the box. I want to put in the work, but on my own terms. It's not so much of a bypass, but more of staying in touch with my passions and morals. I need a basic structure to rely on, one that I can learn from then shatter its boundaries with my thoughts and intent.

Seemingly, I will have to withstand the boring and mundane trials of learning something I feel somewhat proficient in. Of course there is lots for me to learn, but I wish the menial parts were not so necessary for my success. I must think of them as building blocks to my future: each an integral part on my journey to where I am destined. I cannot skip over them or put little effort into them. I must treat them with respect and patience, as I would with anything else.

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There is definitely a bit of a superiority complex in me. An old friend of mine said it was intelligence, but I also think it can be attributed to being treated like I was more mature in my childhood than my actual age.

I grew up fast and learned lessons that most people encounter later in life, or never at all. This has caused me to view the world in a unique way and perhaps act older than I truly am. People treat you differently when they have this mindset surrounding you. While it's nice to be considered deserving of a place at this table, I sometimes wish that this wasn't my seat. I wish that I grew up happily and learned how to socialize earlier and had a supportive, intact family to rely on. But I cannot change the past, and honestly wouldn't. I have become someone who has immense inner strength and does not easily bend to the will of others. My intuition is strong, as is my judgement, which allows me to see through lies and live in reality.

This complex makes me feel above certain experiences and that they are not vital to me as a whole. My tolerance for such tasks is quite low because I simply detest their necessity. I need to humble myself and make certain to remember that greatness is something earned and accumulated over time. One cannot be the best without first practicing and acquiring knowledge. I would feel a fraud if I skipped over such integral parts of my story.

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I have more to say about this, but the words aren't coming to me in a way I can currently decipher. I'll check back in with you once I've sorted this out.

Be well and take care of yourself.

You deserve all the kindness in the world.