Starting

What to do when you don't know what to do?

I like to start at the place that is the most uncomfortable: all of those things I've been putting off for far too long.

I find that what holds me back most often is those things that have been piling up in the back of my mind. I feel restless because I know there's so much I want to do, but these things are standing in my way. Doing my laundry, washing dishes, cleaning up my room, finally brushing my hair and taking a shower. Menial tasks that take up precious mental space with their lack of completion. Although, it is a struggle to even begin these. It can feel too heavy to delve into these tasks. Like there's a mental block standing in your way of completing them.

For me, I like to let my body rest for a while to encourage productivity. Sometimes I just feel so worn out from my day or the thoughts swirling through my mind, that I just need to give myself reprieve. Make good food, spend time with my cat, read an enjoyable book. Any of the core things that help to take my mind off the present and coast in comfortability. Once I feel relaxed and in a more clear state of mind, this is when I look to the things that empower me to approach my tasks. I'll write out my schedule in my planner, make a list of the things I would like to accomplish, meditate to find out what has been blocking my flow. These things that connect me back to the present and gently remind me that they need to be done.

From there, I like to start small. I choose the least time consuming tasks, like picking my clothes off the floor or taking out the garbage, then work my way up to the more immersive ones. Once I've gotten into the flow of moving my body and checking tasks off my list, I am more motivated to continue what I'm doing. It doesn't seem as daunting to vacuum the house or wash my bedding. It comes naturally because I already know how elated I felt after completing a few simple tasks. And so I remind myself of the reward: mental clarity and a feeling of accomplishment deep in my soul.

After not feeling productive for extended periods of time, it's refreshing to get back into the swing of things, you just need to find what encourages you to take this step. Once you begin, you know that things will not be so hard, that they get easier as you keep moving. And once these important tasks are done and dealt with, you finally have space in your mind for inspiration and creativity. You can find that which lights your passion and make magic with your days. The boring parts are over and you can now reap the benefits.

I don't feel so stuck afterwards. I feel less stress and mental clutter. I can breathe without the regret of forgotten responsibilities weighing me down.

I also find that it's easier to take care of myself. I can eat well, stay hydrated, re-discover the joy of working out, all without feeling that I don't deserve it. This, along with building my self-esteem every day, has helped me to realize these fundamental qualities that improve my life. I have been lacking them severely but am now opening my eyes to their importance.

This all to say, these are the first steps in finding your way back to passion. Once you have taken care of your tasks, of nourishing your body, mind, and spirit, you are free to explore the world around you. Spend time with friends, learn a language, discover new places, master a skill, build upon years of accumulated knowledge, create with your hands; the possibilities are endless. Once you nurture and care for all of the physicalities tied into your spirit, you can flourish.

It's also important to hold a positive mindset as you traverse your days. When you feel those inklings of self-deprecation taking hold of you, do best to divert your focus. Let those thoughts pass through you and do not grasp onto them. The more attachment that you form with them, the less you will be able to let them go. This could mean moving your body or removing yourself from a situation. Do not feel guilty for having to escape for a moment if it means resetting your internal balance and structure.

We all need time to ourselves to recharge and find peaceful moments. You must carve out room for rest and relaxation so that overwhelming emotions don't get the best of you, as this is when you are most vulnerable. Find something to occupy you. Workout, make a new recipe, go thrifting. Something that re-centres you and allows you to keep positive thinking intact. I personally like to sit with my feelings of discomfort and try to unveil their true meaning. I reflect on my life and give thought to the things that have been causing me great stress. I narrow it down to a few specific things then think of ways that I can combat them, a strategy to get myself out of a negative headspace. If there is nothing I can do in the moment, then I make peace with the fact that time will reveal the answers. This does not mean I am powerless, rather I am not in a position to currently solve these issues. Maybe it's something I can't control, like my cat getting sick or a rude co-worker. But what I can control is how I view these things. I can let doom and gloom surround me, or I can be optimistic and not let it surround my life. I can prevail with my activities, of course not forgetting their importance, but finding the silver lining in all of my issues.

Positive reinforcement is helpful. I remind myself that what is not in my control doesn't define me. It does not make me less than and it certainly doesn't define my worth. Solutions will present themselves as I am ready to accept them and I am prepared to be patient. I remind myself that what is meant for me will find its way into my life, whether by initiative or lying in wait. It's best not to force things. Do what comes naturally and reach out for help when you need it. You'd be surprised by the people in your life that are willing to support you if you just seek them out. Do not be afraid of what that means in regards to independence. Everyone needs this support, this backbone to continue on their journey. There is no shame in asking for help, as it can only be of benefit to you.

When you have these pillars in your life, both mental strength and good people surrounding you, you are unstoppable. There is no obstacle too large or unfathomable. They become lighter and less oppressive, they do not cause halts to your day and create vast inner turmoil. You know that you have many options to rely upon and they can all withstand the strongest storms.

It begins within and spreads outward. You are determined, unwavering, and decisive. You know what's best for you and do well to enlighten those important connections in your life of such things. Sure, there will be setbacks, but you are firm in your beliefs and confident in your abilities. You have mastered self-care and rest, you have made friends with the past and look brightly to the future. You are a fortress built upon kindness and compassion that reaches the deepest parts of your soul. You make it a daily promise to be kind to yourself and receive your own forgiveness.

You are impenetrable. You move forward at a steady pace and look kindly upon your lessons.

Aren't you glad that you started?